Finding Your People, Building A Community
Solitude is an essential part of a writer’s life. Alone, our imaginations can run wild. We can read passages of written work aloud to hear how the writing flows. We can talk to ourselves to puzzle out plot problems. We can sit and write for stretches and get up for tea or a walk whenever we need the break without answering to anyone. This time spent in solitude is something I protect and cherish.
But it’s healthy to balance isolation with connection—especially to the wider world of books and readers and other writers. The company of other bookish people gives us the support we need to keep going, affirmation of our written work, and the sense of belonging to a broader community of people with the same goals.
I treasure three distinct communities of people who keep me moving forward as a writer: my writing group of four, the beta readers I reach out to for help with drafts, and the large and diverse group of writers I have come to know from attending writing events and through personal introductions. Each group challenges me in different ways to be a better writer and an even better writer friend.
The how-to of meeting and connecting can be bewildering for everyone, more so if we’re new writers. Nudge yourself to sign up for writing conferences or workshops. When there, be just as prepared to read and discuss your group members’ work as you expect them to be prepared for yours. Attend author readings whenever possible and help spread the word about others’ books at your local bookstores, among book discussion groups, and across your social media platforms. Bolster your newfound friends when they are down and need encouragement. By being genuinely helpful and engaged, you’ll establish yourself as a supporter of other writers—a reputation that can only help you grow your circle.
Reach out to astute readers when you’re ready for, or in need of, constructive feedback on your story. Some writers ask beta readers to look at a full, close-to-final draft for general impressions of the work. I ask for beta reads in my early or middle drafts when I want an assessment of something specific, such as “Is the time shift between sections comprehensible? Or confusing?” My go-to beta readers are a few writer friends who read critically but helpfully, and I always offer to return the favor. By trusting each other with our writing, we’ve built friendships that affirm and elevate each other’s work.
This is true of my writers’ group also, although the work we do there is equal parts manuscript critique, craft discussion, and support group. When assembling a writing group, large or small, you’ll likely invite individuals at various stages in their manuscripts. Keep in mind that group goals must adapt and grow as the individuals’ needs change, and a schedule of submit work/critique work might not suit everyone at every stage. Allowing for conversation time helps keep a group vital and fresh. Some of the best bonding happens in the moments of off-script conversations about our writing struggles or our craft or something altogether unrelated to writing.
With time, authentic engagement in all these areas will reward you with welcoming, supportive circles of writing friends. Together, you will motivate each other through the solitary times, celebrate each other’s successes, and offer a buffer to the disappointments. Start finding your people. You’ll be glad you did.